Thank you for the support. It feels quite daunting to decide to quit under the circumstances. I'm staring at the music notes and my violin and thinking I don't know when they'll be back as part of my life. Right now I can't really bring myself to it as these are such strong reminders of how I've failed as a pupil and as a friend, at playing and at resolving problems.
If it helps anyone in similar situations, I'd say voice your concern as soon as it becomes one, before a pattern is set and mistakenly thought to be acceptable to both.
Hi Jessica and welcome to the forums.
Please do not think that you have failed as a pupil and friend, friendship is a two way thing and you clearly respect that from your posts and as to failing as a pupil you say yourself that your technique has improved since learning with him so very clearly not a failure. I think many on this forum would be in awe of your playing.
It seems to me though that you are missing an emotional connection with the music, at the moment its all about the technique, maybe take a step back and try playing just for yourself for a while, maybe experiment with different styles of music, listen to new things, when was the last time you tried something modern and weird?
I wish you all the best and please don't stop playing