You'd think this would be a happy as I saw consultant today and I am having my eye sorted on Friday (new lens). The argh is that surgery on my eye is my worst nightmare... there's a reason I don't wear contact lenses...
I'll just have to get on with it.
TV, what are you having done? Is it with a local or a general anaesthetic?
I've had surgery on both eyes with local and with general anaesthetic, and I have got used to it. And you will, as you say, get on with it. I have found that when I'm afraid of something, before it happens, I am not afraid when it happens because I've got it there, it's actually happening, and I think we all do "deal with it" in some way, even if it's by screaming - but the fear was what I feared most until I learnt that this was the one thing that wouldn't be present.
When I had my first corneal transplant 22 years ago I twice had to have it corrected under a local - this means a couple of incisions to loosen the stretch in one direction. I could not believe they would do it while I was awake, and I went to ask my GP about it. I fully expected him to say "of course you are entitled to have a general anaesthetic if that's what you want, I'll arrange for it". Did he heck. He just said "you'll be all right" And sure enough, I was
There were two things I was apprehensive about, and by the time I had to have the same procedure done a second time I was so blasé about it you just wouldn't believe it. I had come to realise that if you can work out exactly what you're afraid of it's much easier to deal with.
The first was that I would feel something, that the anaesthetic would not work I had a couple of tests on the day before and realised that optical anaesthetics are THE fastest acting thing on this earth and totally effective, really strong. The second was the speculum that would be put in to hold my eye open so I wouldn't blink. Now I am the world's no. 1 worst flincher without a doubt. My consultant in Liverpool used to call me "oh no not you again". But the doctor didn't say anything, he just opened my eyelids and stuck it in (I had been numbed by then) and I actually tested it by trying to blink. I realised I couldn't. Towards the end of the second operation I was dimly aware of a thread, a needle and a pair of scissors, and I had not even realised they were going to include sutures in this procedure, they had done it without my being aware of it.
This all meant not to wind you up but to reassure you that, as my GP said, "you'll be all right". If it's a general you won't know anything until after it's over and there on;t be agonising pain, just a bit of soreness. If it's a local, I promise you it will not hurt and the only thing you need to make sure of is that you don't move at the crucial moment - but nas my second surgeon said "will you move? Oh, I don't think you will, you know" and nobody does.
They're very good, eye surgeons. They're not like that b*gger that blinded both Bach and Handel! Good luck, keep us posted.