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Being Over-critical


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#31 sbhoa

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 16:03

My clarinet teacher commented this morning that when she says something need improving I readily take it on board but when she says something is good I have a very neutral reaction.. dry.gif
Thinking about it I actually work quite hard on not showing a positive reaction to praise. blink.gif
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#32 jojo

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 16:27

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 05:03 PM) View Post


Thinking about it I actually work quite hard on not showing a positive reaction to praise. blink.gif

what is 'wrong with us'? I think I do too sad.gif
oh dear........
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#33 sbhoa

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 17:33

QUOTE(jojo @ May 10 2010, 05:27 PM) View Post

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 05:03 PM) View Post


Thinking about it I actually work quite hard on not showing a positive reaction to praise. blink.gif

what is 'wrong with us'? I think I do too sad.gif
oh dear........

Hmmm... and I suppose it's actually not awfully polite not to acknowledge praise either.....
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#34 miffy

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 17:47

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 06:33 PM) View Post

QUOTE(jojo @ May 10 2010, 05:27 PM) View Post

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 05:03 PM) View Post


Thinking about it I actually work quite hard on not showing a positive reaction to praise. blink.gif

what is 'wrong with us'? I think I do too sad.gif
oh dear........

Hmmm... and I suppose it's actually not awfully polite not to acknowledge praise either.....



In my last lesson my teacher suddenly said "that's it!" over a passage I'd been struggling with.
That's what? I thought - that's it, Im fired??
Turns out he thought it was good, but I still now can't hear what he heard, I thought it was awful laugh.gif





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#35 jojo

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 18:08

QUOTE(miffy @ May 10 2010, 06:47 PM) View Post

In my last lesson my teacher suddenly said "that's it!" over a passage I'd been struggling with.
That's what? I thought - that's it, Im fired??
Turns out he thought it was good, but I still now can't hear what he heard, I thought it was awful laugh.gif

rofl.gif

sometimes my teacher does tell me 'that's really good', but I can't help to think he is saying so 'just to please me', I mean, he's a GREAT violinist, years and years of experience at high levels etc etc played with famous players etc...etc and 'he tells me that sounds good or that is 'really' good??'
I can't 'truly' believe it, or I do and I don't if it makes any sense wacko.gif wacko.gif that's it, we are 'doomed'!! (like rosfrog says) laugh.gif
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#36 sbhoa

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 18:40

QUOTE(miffy @ May 10 2010, 06:47 PM) View Post

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 06:33 PM) View Post

QUOTE(jojo @ May 10 2010, 05:27 PM) View Post

QUOTE(sbhoa @ May 10 2010, 05:03 PM) View Post


Thinking about it I actually work quite hard on not showing a positive reaction to praise. blink.gif

what is 'wrong with us'? I think I do too sad.gif
oh dear........

Hmmm... and I suppose it's actually not awfully polite not to acknowledge praise either.....



In my last lesson my teacher suddenly said "that's it!" over a passage I'd been struggling with.
That's what? I thought - that's it, Im fired??
Turns out he thought it was good, but I still now can't hear what he heard, I thought it was awful laugh.gif

Last time I said something like that was...erm.... the last time I'll say something like that.
The 'so you don't believe what your teacher says' lecture is not one I'd want twice. ph34r.gif

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#37 miffy

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 19:06

blush.gif blush.gif blush.gif blush.gif


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#38 Fran*Piano

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 21:07

QUOTE(miffy @ May 9 2010, 04:17 PM) View Post

QUOTE(randomsabreur @ May 9 2010, 03:47 PM) View Post

I'm a lot more self critical now than I was as a child. This seems to help as I can notice glitches, tuning etc, which I struggled with a lot when I was younger. However, it's also a handicap, because if I'm unsure I end up playing quieter, which can make everything sound even worse!

For me the biggest difference learning now compared with at school is actually in stamina. Although I "practice" a lot more now than I ever did when I was at school, I was probably doing hours a week of music before practicing, all of which involved breath control - Choir (1 hour) Orchestra (1 hours) Wind Band (1 hour) Chamber choir (30 mins) Madrigals (30 mins) Recorder group (30 mins) Recorder Consort (30 mins). Add in a flute lesson, and even a nominal amount of practice and that is a lot more than I can fit in now around general household stuff, and not practicing when OH is around coz he winges!


Aha!! Sounds like a job for the heavy metal practice mute! (see other thread!)
It's great for all those loud 'I haven't quite got the hang of this yet' disasters and crunch chords laugh.gif laugh.gif


I ADORE my metal practice mute-the only slight problem is, it seems to throw my ears off balance by making it so quiet and my ears "pop" whenever I use it! laugh.gif

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#39 jojo

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 21:15

QUOTE(Fran*Piano @ May 10 2010, 10:07 PM) View Post


I ADORE my metal practice mute-the only slight problem is, it seems to throw my ears off balance by making it so quiet and my ears "pop" whenever I use it! laugh.gif

I find it SO quite I often have trouble 'hearing myself properly' (ie cannot hear as well am I playing right note and in tune???) dry.gif
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#40 Fran*Piano

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 21:19

QUOTE(jojo @ May 10 2010, 10:15 PM) View Post

QUOTE(Fran*Piano @ May 10 2010, 10:07 PM) View Post


I ADORE my metal practice mute-the only slight problem is, it seems to throw my ears off balance by making it so quiet and my ears "pop" whenever I use it! laugh.gif

I find it SO quite I often have trouble 'hearing myself properly' (ie cannot hear as well am I playing right note and in tune???) dry.gif


I know what you mean-but they're good when dad's feeling grumpy/is asleep! laugh.gif
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#41 Guest: Juniper_*

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Posted 10 May 2010 - 21:21

Right, I've been trying to work out an adequate response after trialling the "not being so self critical" experiment. laugh.gif

Tried it on Friday with mixed results. First time I hit a wrong note I thought to myself, well that's that disproven. Took me a while to remember that this isn't about achieving perfection but being less hard on myself.

The sax player said in the break "great solo". I said are you sure it was ok and she said there were a couple of dodgy bits but you slipped right off them as if nothing had happened. It would appear I normally make errors more obvious blush.gif

One of the audience then spoke to me outside. He's been to a few gigs and he said you appear to be enjoying it more so you're putting more into it. Whether this was coincidence I'm not sure.

All in all though I think I enjoyed this weekends gigs more than I have done in a while. I forgot the "I'm tired and can do without this" and the "I wonder what the Bass player will whinge about tonight" and had fun. I think I played better but most importantly I was happy with my performance.

Oh and about praise I always try to accept praise graciously even if I'm cringing inside. I had a previous teacher who said to disagree with it is insulting to the person praising you in saying they don't know what they're talking about.

Hope all this makes sense unsure.gif
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