With regards to the ‚guilty party‘ I loved the Mum who took her child to kindergarten for the first time and said that she promised not to believe every tale the child came home with about the goings on in kindergarten if the teacher would promise not to believe all the tales of things which happened at home.
I take some of the things I am told by parents with a pinch of salt.
That's exactly what I meant.
Thinking about this problem again this morning, I wondered whether it might help some 'resistant' children to get the basic idea of hand position and use of the individual fingers if they were encouraged to play 'elephants'. Middle finger is the trunk and the other four fingers are the legs. Two elephants could wave to each other with one foot, the elephants could walk forwards, backwards, two feet simultaneously, all separately - various actions.
It won't stop them playing the piano with one finger at home, but it is something they could perhaps do with their mother or siblings without being told it is 'right' or 'wrong' and it might just improve their hand position or finger control. Maybe it's a daft idea but any old port in a storm!
Gran'piano, I try and get youngsters to tap each finger on their thumb, make the shape of a bird's head and play notes.
This probably works very well as long as the children will/can practice it like that at home too.
With the elephants, I was thinking more of those children mentioned by several other posters where the child has great difficulty with coordination or comprehension, has got into bad habits or for some other reason is making slow progress. I simply cannot imagine a mother who also has other children and other responsibilites being too keen on the idea of using her individual precious prime time with this child '*hacking away' at the child's technique 'tap your finger on your thumb before you play the note', time after time, day after day. I'm not saying they wouldn't try to do it, but I fear the enthusiasm of both child and parent would wane quite rapidly. Sadly it might end up with the child giving up the idea of music lessons.
For me, any idea to lighten the job and speed up the learning process at this difficult stage is worth trying.
The situation where the music teacher thinks the parents should 'help' more, reminds me a little of the school situation here with a neighbour's child.
With her University Degree and relevant diploma the teacher is qualified to teach. She explains a grammatical rule to the class. A child comes home with homework and tells its mother that it doesn't understand the task. Put bluntly, the teacher was unable to do the job of explaining the work clearly enough. And now, suddenly, the mother, who would not be permitted to homeschool the child as she is insufficiently qualified to do so, must do the teacher's job for her?
*this is child's-speak for Mummy doing her best to help.
You can all come out guns blazing now.